


Someone Like You

by Tamasha



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/M, Feels, Friendship/Love, Gay, High School, Light Angst, Love, Love Confessions, M/M, Modern Era, Protective Arthur, Protectiveness, Relationship(s), Romance, Shyness, Speech Disorders, Stuttering, Sweet
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-14
Updated: 2016-09-14
Packaged: 2018-08-15 02:23:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,965
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8038495
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tamasha/pseuds/Tamasha
Summary: Merlin has a stutter and is very self conscious about it. Arthur is more protective than he should be.





	Someone Like You

**Author's Note:**

> written by Tamara

Merlin hated parties more than he hated ties. And that was saying a lot. Arthur knew this, yet he still dragged his best friend to Gwaine’s birthday party. Everyone was going, and the thought of Merlin sitting at home reading, or playing dumb video games, alone, was a little bit uncomfortable. Arthur wanted to get Merlin out more, force him to actually interact with people his own age. He was the kind of student who stayed in after class and hung out with the teacher, and then went straight to the library to study. It was impossible to get him to even come sit with Arthur at lunch. So it seemed like a good idea to bring Merlin to the party to see if he could maybe make a few friends in the process. Arthur hated having to hang out with Merlin separate from his other friends and really wanted his best friend to be comfortable within the group.

Of course Merlin hated the idea of a party setting, but it was Gwaine’s birthday and Merlin needed be there. He whined the entire drive over and Arthur nearly gave in and drove the idiot home. But he didn’t. This was for Merlin; the kid needed some friends. As much as he would never want to admit it, Merlin was lonely. He had been lonely for a few months now. After the break-up with his first boyfriend, Will, he had sunk in on himself. He had become even more of a hermit than he usually was. Yes, Merlin had always been an outcast, but it had gotten worse. When they first met at the age of eight, Arthur had invited him to play ball with the other boys at recess, and Merlin’s response was deadpan silence. Throwing the ball at the silent, weird, big eared, boy, Arthur asked him again. The ball just hit Merlin’s knee and bounced away slowly, with no reaction from Merlin. It took three whole weeks to get Merlin to even speak to him, but they had been inseparable ever since.

Merlin wasn’t just quiet, he really didn’t speak much at all. He talked to Arthur all the time - sometimes he wouldn’t shut up - but he had always had trouble speaking to people he wasn’t comfortable with. Ever since he was little, he only had a select few who he could talk to. Huntith once told Arthur that Merlin didn’t start talking till the age of five. The reason Merlin only spoke when he was comfortable was because he was incredibly insecure about his stutter. It was hardly even a stutter, but he had gotten it in his stupid head that it was the worst speech impediment in the world. So he spoke as little as possible. One time, in Mr. Bennett’s class, he did an entire oral presentation in sign language. Reluctantly, Mr. Bennett gave him credit for the assignment, because honestly, who learns sign language just to get out of talking? But most teachers liked Merlin enough that they let him do alternative work so that he wouldn’t have to do any speeches. Everyone liked Merlin. Though he didn’t talk to most, people seemed to trust him easily. It was a quality that Arthur had always envied.

“B-but you can s-speak n-normally, you c-clot-pole,” he had told Arthur once when he had brought it up. They were in Merlin’s kitchen with Hunith’s freshly baked cookies in front of them. 

Arthur threw a cookie at his friend for calling him names. “Shut up, Merlin. People do like you; everyone just thinks I’m an arrogant prat.”

Merlin just smiled smugly as if to say, ‘You are an arrogant prat, Arthur.’ He deserved another cookie to the face. Merlin retaliated with his crumpled up napkin, it was a pathetic attempt that sent both into a fit of giggles. “S-seriously, Arthur, everyone l-loves you. You, you, h-have a m-magnetic personality. D-don’t doubt yours-self.”

He didn’t need to say more; Merlin just shoved another cookie in his mouth, avoiding Arthur’s eyes. Arthur was aware of the big gap in their “social standing” at school. Arthur was a “jock” and Merlin was a “nerd”: typical. But none of that had ever mattered to Arthur and it pained him to think that his best friend bought into all that high school bullshit. Because Merlin was so much more than the quiet nerd with a stutter. He was smart, even if he was a bit of a smart-ass. He was funny, even if he was a little snarky. And though he was a bit clumsy and pretty terrible at keeping himself organized, Arthur loved him dearly, and he wished Merlin understood that.

They pulled up to Gwaine’s house twenty minutes late. Not only was Merlin resistant to going, but it was impossible to get Merlin anywhere on time. “C-can I s-stay in the c-car?”

“No, Merlin. Let’s go! Come on, it will be fun.” Opening his car door, he smiled at Merlin and placed his hand on his friend’s knee with a small squeeze for reassurance. “I won’t abandon you, okay?”

Merlin nodded in response and got out with a sigh. It was really important to Arthur that Merlin had a good time tonight. He wanted Merlin to be comfortable with his friends. He wanted Merlin around more. And he wanted his friends to like Merlin. Having Arthur’s two worlds constantly separate was more than annoying, it was infuriating. His best friend should not feel uncomfortable around his other friends.

Gwaine’s house was in the middle of nowhere. Well, it was only about 25 minutes away from Arthur, but still, nothing else was around. There was a dirt lot with about ten cars parked in a scattered mess, impersonating a parking lot. About 60 or some odd students - or at least Arthur hoped they were all students - had gathered for this particular affair. Believe it or not, this was actually a small get together for Gwaine.

They walked together through the mass of people on Gwaine’s front lawn. A group of kids stood in front of the door blocking the entrance to the house. Arthur didn’t recognize most of them, but he knew Valiant, the unliked jerk on the football team. “Arthur! You came! And you brought your little friend! Umm…” Valliant had always missed the memo Arthur unofficially gave all his friends, which was: don’t fucking mess with Merlin. “What’s his name?”

Arthur pushed a hand to Valiant’s chest. It was meant to be playful, but admittedly there was a bit more force behind the motion than strictly necessary. “Shut up.”

“What?” Valiant shrugged, spilling his beer over his shirt. “Fuckin’ Marvin, right?”

Not many people liked Valiant, or his stupid jokes, but Merlin especially hated them. Since he always felt invisible, Arthur knew this particular joke was the last thing Merlin would have wanted to hear. “It’s Merlin, and you know that, Valiant. Stop being an ass.”

“Oh come on, Arthur. Lighten up, it’s a party! And Marvin is welcome to be here, he just needs to actually talk to us for once.” Valiant had clearly been drinking, and was not in his right mind, but even he knew better.

Arthur grabbed Merlin’s arm. “Come on. Let’s go find Gwaine.”

“Yeah, okay Arthur, you take your little boyfriend and go have a good evening.” All Arthur saw was a flash of white before he found himself pinning Valiant to the wall. “So help me, Valiant, you had better shut the fuck up right now.” His voice was low and threatening and even Arthur didn’t recognize it.

Feeling a slight tug on his sleeve, Arthur relaxed. “Okay, sorry.” Valiant said, throwing his hands over his head in defeat with his long forgotten beer spilling behind him again. “Whatever.”

Merlin was still clinging onto Arthur’s sleeve giving him a worried look. He wasn’t mad, or annoyed, and there was no ‘I told you so’ waiting to be said, he simply looked worried. “Sorry, M,” Arthur whispered as they walked through the front door. “He’s just such an ass, I -”

Merlin cut him off with a quick eyebrow raise, looking like his smug uncle, Gaius. He simply shook his head and smiled at Arthur.

“Don’t tell me what to do,” Arthur retorted smugly. “I’ll defend your honor any way I want.” Arthur got a jab in the ribs for that, but Merlin was smiling. A sweet kind of smile that reached his eyes and made Arthur’s heart skip a beat. “Come on, Merlin.” Arthur grabbed his friend’s hand and pulled him through the crowd towards the kitchen. "Let's get a drink."

 

After finding a drunk Gwaine and Percival, things relaxed a little. They follow him out to the patio where most of Arthur’s friends had gathered in a circle of chairs all with drinks in their hand. Leon was with his new girlfriend Mithian, who was in a white summer dress, looking a bit like a goddess; Leon, however, was not dressed like reggae bass player, for once, so she must have been really good for him. Gwaine and Percival, as usual, had "ironically" matched their outfits as they liked to pretend to be a couple that didn’t care about doing all the usual couple crap, but they totally were, and everyone knew it. Then there was Lance, who was just sadly watching Gwen talk to Elyan, pining.

"You know that's her brother, right?" Gwaine asked, poking Lance into reality again. 

"What?"

"Elyan is her brother. Don’t be so jealous." Gwaine took a drag of his cigarette and patted his friend again. "Go talk to her already."

Lance surveyed his group of friends with a look of terror and then bit his lip. "I couldn’t. I don’t know what to say to her."

Even Mithian giggled at that. They all knew Lance had been in love with her ever since she moved into town. Though, he couldn’t bring himself to actually introduce himself. "Don't worry, mate. Maybe she will talk to you." Percival had meant that seriously, but that just sent the group into another burst of laughter. Arthur thought he saw even Merlin smile at that.

Gwaine must have noticed Arthur looking at his friend, because he sat up and leaned forward to say, "by the way, Merlin, it's good to see you came out of hiding tonight. Thanks!" Then he got up to give him a massive hug that made Merlin grunt softly.

Merlin patted Gwaine’s shoulder after he pulled away, giving him an energetic nod as if to say he was glad to come. Arthur smiles and looked down at the beer in his hands. 

Though he didn’t speak, the group had gotten pretty good at understanding Merlin’s own way of communicating. Or at least the best they could. It was nice to have people make an effort to try and understand Merlin, he really needed more patient people in his life. And Merlin even seemed to be coming out of his shell the best he could, which wasn't very far at all, but for Merlin it was just short of a miracle.

The rest of the night continued in a similar manner, with lots of jokes about Lance never making a move on Gwen, and how Mithian has got Leon whipped. The typical conversation for them. They all stayed out on the patio together, enjoying the close company to the raging party inside. Eventually Gwaine and Percival had to go make their rounds to say goodbye to the other party-goers. At one point Lance actually did get drunk enough to go over and talk to Gwen, making a fool of himself, but it was a sweet pick up line. By the end of the night, though, it was just the seven of them again.

"She gave me her number, so apparently my line worked." Lance snorted out a giggle, falling off the lawn chair.

Leon helped him up as he added, "That doesn’t mean that the pick up line was any good."

"'Help me find my heart, I think I left it with you'? Come on. That's golden!" Gwaine shouted, kissing Percival. "It would have worked on Percy."

The group cooed on chorus as the couple kissed. Merlin raised his hand eagerly. He did this sometimes when he wanted to say something because he didn’t like speaking up to gain the attention of a group, so he had found his own way of silencing everyone visually. 

"Does Merlin has something to add?" Percival asked in a gentle tone.

"Why don't you just say it already?" Mithian asked sarcastically.

The group was silent for a moment, staring at her; even Leon pulled away to glare at her slightly. Finally Gwaine looked to Arthur since, apparently, it was his job to explain Merlin to other people, since no one really knew how to handle these situations or understand Merlin well enough themselves to be able to find the right words anyhow. Even Lance, who was the most soft-spoken after Merlin, hardly heard him speak more than a handful of times.

"That's just how Merlin gets people's attention." Arthur replied simply, as if it was the most normal thing in the world. Because it wasn't abnormal! Fuck Mithian and her polished finger nails, there was nothing wrong with Merlin and his hand raising. Arthur took a deep breath calming himself, she had just asked a simple question, he reminded himself.

Leon stroked his girlfriend gingerly and whispered something in her ear. Arthur didn’t know that he said, but she nodded and looked embarrassed, so he must have seen able to explain it, somehow. 

Arthur turned his attention back to Merlin, but it was too late, Merlin wasn’t going to say anything now. He was picking at the label on his beer, classic social avoidance strategy. Despite Percival and Lance’s gentle coaxing, and Gwaine’s not-so-gentle coaxing, Arthur knew Merlin was going to be silent the rest of the evening.

"Let's get going, shall we?" Arthur asked, whispering for only Merlin to hear. "Come on, Merlin."

After some short goodbyes and a confused hug from Mithian, Arthur had Merlin all to himself. As they headed back to the car, the rest of the party was dying down, so it was as good a time as any to make an excuse to leave. Several people were still in the house, but most were passed out in various places inside. Arthur noticed Valiant sleeping on the floor in front of the fireplace, with a mustache drawn on his face. He laughed to himself, glad that karma had come around. 

When they finally got back outside, Arthur relaxed ever so slightly. It was a quiet, clear night and that made it easy to walk in silence back to his car.

"S-sorry," Merlin muttered when they got in the car.

"For what?" Arthur frowned. "For Mithian? Don't worry about her, Merlin. She just doesn't understand how you work. And she doesn't have to. There's nothing wrong with you or anything to apologize for."

Merlin nodded, but he was staring at his hands. Arthur put down his keys and turned to Merlin, purposefully. "Don’t apologize for who you are, Merlin. Not ever."

He received a smile from his friend that told Arthur he was okay. At least for now. Suddenly, Arthur felt incredibly guilty for pulling his friend out for the evening. Merlin would have been much happier at home. First, there was the situation with Valiant, and then Mithian making her misguided comment. And he had been so close to speaking too! Of course Mithian didn’t mean anything by it, but Arthur found it easy to blame her for keeping Merlin from saying what he was going to say.

"I hope you still had a good time," Arthur whispered as he started to drive down the road.

It was a long moment before Merlin finally said, "I always h-have a good t-time with, with, you." 

Tentatively, Arthur reached out and took Merlin’s hand. They drove the rest of the way home with their fingers interlaced and didn't say a word. They didn't need to.

 

For a week after Gwaine’s birthday party, Arthur was feeling immensely guilty and had tried to make it up to Merlin in several ways. First he brought him chocolate and orange juice, Merlin's two most favorite things in all the world. Then Arthur came over and sat through four painful episodes of Spaced, because Merlin had been begging him to watch it for years. And lastly he tried to get Merlin back in the group, to make him feel comfortable again.  Honestly, Arthur had no reason to feel like he had done something wrong, Merlin had agreed to go to the party and had insisted that he had had a good time. Still, Arthur wanted to make sure Merlin was completely comfortable and happy and if Mithian made another disrespectful comment, Arthur might have to insist Leon get a new girlfriend, because Merlin wasn't going anywhere, damnit.

The following Monday finally rolled around and Arthur spotted Merlin by his locker in the morning. He couldn’t help but smile.

“Hey big ears,” Arthur greeted casually.

Merlin just rolled his eyes.

“You're coming to eat with me today, aren't you?”

His friend looked worried as he shut his locker. Merlin shrugged, pointing to his History book.

Arthur shook his head. “You can study later. I want you there, Merlin. Please?”

After a pause Merlin looked back up with a smile and nodded. Arthur couldn’t deny that the smile was probably his favorite smile in the universe, but he'd never ever admit it.

Now, it wasn’t that Merlin didn’t like Arthur’s friends - they were all easy enough to get along with - but he truthfully didn’t want to socialize. And Arthur understood, he did. It just bothered him because he wanted to share his best friend with everyone, while also keeping him all to himself. It was confusing, really.

Merlin wasn’t even offended by Mithian's comment at the party. He knew new people were confused by him, which didn't bother him as much as it seemed. What turned Merlin off from social interactions was that eventually he  _ would _ feel comfortable enough to speak and everyone would make fun of his speech impediment. It was a bit absurd, of course, even Merlin knew that, but it didn’t make him any more social, that's for sure.

Arthur was extremely overprotective, which of course didn’t help. He completely overreacted to the Mithian situation, and probably overcorrected as well. But that's fine. He'd do anything for Merlin. In some ways, Arthur held Merlin back from speaking more than Merlin himself. He would take his friend out of a situation as soon as he believed it to be too much, and never gave Merlin the chance to navigate and situation on his own. But that was going to change. Maybe.

Arthur's need to include Merlin in his life was flattering in it's own way, though. Even if Arthur’s world had people like Valiant and stressors that kept Merlin quiet, he was glad that Arthur was trying. It was nice to have someone care so much about him. One time Arthur threatened George with a spoon because the kid - a grade lower than them - had accidentally stepped on Merlin’s foot. So for Arthur's sake, Merlin agreed to spend lunch with his friends. Normally, Merlin would want to read alone in the library, but he figured Arthur had a point about making some new friends and indulging in real life social interactions. Though, Merlin had always thought Arthur was enough of a friend for a lifetime and he didn’t need any more social interactions than he experienced on a regular basis.

Gwaine was throwing grapes at Arthur’s head while Arthur held his gaze with Percival as they talked about the upcoming football practice. "Are you going to flirt with my boyfriend all lunch, or are we going to talk about something that matters?" Gwaine asked throwing another grape that landed on Arthur’s ear.

From what Merlin could gather, Gwaine hated talking about football, even though he was on the team with them. "I'm not flirting, Gwaine!" Percival said, missing the joke entirely.

Merlin slapped a hand to his head and held back his laughter. "Got something to say, Merlin?" Gwaine piped, nudging him playfully. "Hmm? Do you know something about flirting with Arthur?"

Arthur’s eyes flew open causing the rest of the table, including Merlin, to burst out in laughter. "I don’t... he didn't... I'm not flirting!" Arthur yelled, exasperated. 

No matter how old they got, Arthur always got so upset when people accused him of flirting, or really anything relatively close to the idea of sex. It was probably his funniest, if not most endearing, qualities. "O-okay, Arthur," Merlin said, quiet enough that only his best friend heard. But Lance saw his mouth move and his face lit up. For whatever reason, whenever Merlin spoke it became a spectacle, like a dog walking on its hind legs. 

"Hey, so who is coming to the beach on Saturday?" Mithian asked as she came to sit down with her boyfriend.

Leon kissed her when she sat and told her he, Gwaine, and Percival had planned on coming. She looked to Lance and Arthur next, ignoring Merlin. It wasn’t like Merlin really wanted to go anyway. The other boys responded while Merlin played with his food. This was one reason he avoided people; no one thought Merlin wanted to be involved in activities. Sure, he was happy to sit at home on a Friday night, but it would still be nice to get invited out every once in a while by someone other than Arthur.

"Merlin?" Mithian said, bringing Merlin back to the table. "You're coming right?"

Merlin’s head shot up in surprise. That was a nice development. Merlin nodded in approval, grinning. Mithian smiled back and poked at her chicken on her tray looking very proud of herself. The rest of lunch Merlin was happy that he finally felt included in the group and didn’t have to be uncomfortable around them. Arthur was right, again, Merlin could use some new faces.

When the lunch bell rang, everyone got up to throw away their trash. Just before leaving, Mithian caught Merlin’s arm and tugged him closer. "Hey can I talk to you?" Merlin complied and followed her off to the side. She waved the others on before turning to Merlin with a serious look. "You don’t like me much do you?"

Looking something like a fish, Merlin just moved his mouth slightly in shock. What had he done to make her think that? He shook his head vigorously.

"Oh come off it, Merlin. I know when I'm not liked. You can’t even speak to me."

Did she really not know? Surely the topic of the selectively mute friend must have come up. But her and Leon had only just started dating, and Merlin really hadn’t come around often enough to be in Leon’s selection of conversation topics. But hadn’t she understood from the party?

"It's fine Merlin, I just really want to fit in with the group. I just want to know what I did to upset you."

Merlin really wanted to say something, but his words wouldn't come. They always got stuck in his chest, boiling under the surface and never rising. The second bell alarmed and she was still staring at him. He pleaded with his eyes, begging for her to understand.

She just shook her head in disapproval. "You confuse me, Merlin. I'm really sorry, for whatever it is that I did."

Merlin made a noise as she walked away. It was hardly a sound but it was enough to turn her around. He signed that he couldn't speak, hoping that was enough to get her to understand. Her face suddenly broke in understanding and guilt.

"Ohhh. Oh my god. Merlin, I am so sorry. I didn’t... I wasn't... oh god, now I get it. Are you deaf?"

Merlin made a face and slapped his forehead. He shrugged half-heartedly not sure of how else to explain himself. Sometimes Merlin used a notebook to communicate, but his bag was closed and on his back. She seemed reassured, albeit still confused, but surely Leon would explain to her now that there was something for her to ask about.

She placed a hand to Merlin’s shoulder and smiled at him. "Thank you."

With that, she walked away to go to class. Merlin felt oddly like throwing up. Realizing his hands were shaking, Merlin trudged off to class wondering if he'd ever have a normal social life. He thought he had done something right for once. And for the first time ever Arthur wasn’t around to help. He walked into his next class late and listened to the teacher tell him there was no excuse to be late. Merlin wordlessly sat in his chair and nodded.

 

"What the hell!?" Arthur yelled, running a hand through his golden hair.

Merlin didn’t mean to make it sound bad, but Arthur had taken it as if Mithian had cornered him and demanded an answer. "I-it's f-fine, Arthur."

"No! What right does she have!? Even if you did hate her, who the fuck cares? Get over it... god!"

"Arthur, c-calm d-down." It was still early, so Uther was not home from work yet. It was rare that Merlin even stayed late enough to see Arthur’s father anyhow because the man was terrifying. Merlin couldn’t even attempt communication with the man non-verbally. When Uther was around, Merlin kept his head low and hardly even looked up. After knowing the man for so long, Merlin found this was the easiest way to deal with him; mute or not, Uther was best ignored.

"Don't tell me to be calm, Merlin. She can't bully you into liking her."

"T-that's not w-what h-happened. S-she unders-stood a-after I ex-explained it."

Arthur just glared at Merlin, as if he were the one to blame. "Whatever. She still pisses me off."

"W-why?"

Arthur sat down next to Merlin on the couch with a huff. "Because I am worried about Leon."

Merlin nodded. Poor Arthur, he felt obligated to worry about everyone's safety more than his own. He had always felt like he had to be the savior of all his friends. He cared deeply about Leon, so of course he needed protection, but the anger Arthur was displaying was a bit unnecessary.

"I know I am being crazy. I'll take it down a notch," Arthur agrees, reading Merlin’s thoughts, as usual.

"G-good," Merlin piped happily. "W-wanna w-watch a m-movie?"

Arthur nodded, but he was studying Merlin astutely. "Did you get a haircut?"

Merlin's hand automatically shot up to his hair. He shook his head and raised an eyebrow.

"It looks good," Arthur said, as if Merlin was a painting he had just finished,  or a car he was looking to buy - some object of desire. Arthur had never looked at him that way before... Sure, there were times when Merlin had thought that Arthur thought of him as more than a friend, but they had passed that point long ago, they were just friends now. Right? It had been too long.

"T-thanks," Merlin responded carefully. Arthur turned on the television and settled in, placing his hand on Merlin’s knee. "W-what?" Merlin asked, incredulously.

Arthur looked at his hand in surprise and pulled it away like it was touching a hot stove. "Sorry. Oh, I... I didn’t mean to... that was..." He let his face fall into his waiting hands. "God, Merlin. You must think I'm crazy."

Merlin chuckled, which made his friend resurface again. He shook his head with a smile and then pulled Arthur’s hand back to his knee, bringing his attention back to the screen. Then Arthur relaxed and Merlin smiled, trying to keep his attention on the screen.

Merlin didn’t overthink it. It just happened. It meant nothing. Arthur was just weird sometimes, showing his affection in odd ways, it really was meaningless. And if Arthur’s hand snaked around Merlin’s waist later in the night, Merlin wasn’t going to say anything about it tomorrow.

 

Arthur was glad Merlin had decided to sit with the group at lunch more often. He still rarely spoke, but he was around and that was good enough. Merlin wasn’t shy at all, he would still engage in the conversation, just not with his words. Everyone seemed to get along with him well, like Arthur knew they would, and finally Arthur started to feel his anxieties ease up. Even Mithian was becoming less problematic; she didn't seem to make Merlin uncomfortable anymore and her and Leon seemed to be doing really well together too. Arthur was content with Merlin fitting in so easily with his friends; it was all he ever wanted. It wasn’t till he found Merlin talking with Gwaine after school that Arthur started to notice his... well, it wasn't jealousy, it was... protectiveness?

Merlin had been friends with only Arthur for so long so Arthur hadn’t exactly had to deal with this emotion before. Gwaine was harmless, truthfully, but what if  _ Merlin  _ didn't understand his sense humor, or Gwaine said something that ended up making Merlin uncomfortable? What if Arthur wasn’t there to explain Merlin, what would Merlin do then? He'd be trapped like he was with Mithian the other day, without Arthur. And what was Merlin doing speaking out loud!?

Save for a few words or phrases, Merlin never used his words; not unless Arthur was around, and even then, it was rare. The only other person that Arthur could think of whom Merlin had spoken to without Arthur around was Will, and he had broken Merlin’s heart. If Arthur wasn’t there to defend Merlin, to protect him, who would? Gwaine wasn’t a bad guy, none of their friends were. Not one of them would hurt Merlin on purpose, or do anything like Will had done. That's why Arthur had helped Merlin warm up to them, because he trusted them. It would be fine.

Arthur let it go for a few weeks when it was just a few close friends that Merlin began speaking to. But then it wasn't fine anymore.

Merlin had talked about speech therapy one time since Arthur had met him. It was in third grade when he asked his mother if something was wrong with him after Agravaine had made fun of him in Maths class. Arthur was over for dinner that night, and he never forgot Hunith's words to her son, "Merlin, dear, you are perfect the way you are, you don't need to change anything about yourself. If one day you feel the need to see a specialist, I will support you, but don't ever change for someone else. Make sure you do it for you."

It was a Saturday night when Merlin brought it up for the second time, years later. They were in Arthur’s room, doing homework, silently, when suddenly Merlin said, "I t-think I s-should g-get help."

"Help!?" Arthur blurted out. He was sitting on his floor, legs spread and his history books spread out around him. "What do you mean?" Merlin was great at chemistry, which was the homework he was working on, laying on Arthur’s bed. Merlin definitely wasn’t talking about a tutor because he was probably the smartest one in school.

Merlin frowned. "S-speech t-therapy, Arthur."

Squaring his shoulders, Arthur put his book away and turned to meet Merlin’s frown with his own. "You don’t need special help for that. Why do you even want to go to therapy, Merlin? You don't need it."

"R-r-r-really?" Arthur could have sworn Merlin was over exaggerating his stutter to make a point. He did that sometimes to get sympathy points. It worked on Hunith, but never on Arthur.

Arthur narrowed his eyes. "Yes really. Other than the whole 'getting-rid-of-a-stutter' thing, what could you get out of it? What is your real motivation?"

"I, I just w-want t-to..." He trailed off, looking at Arthur with truly desperate eyes. "I w-want to be, be m-more like y-you."

"What?" Arthur’s face fell flat.

Merlin shrugged inwardly. "Y-you t-talk to every-everyone. A-and you are c-confident. I'm j-just a l-loser w-with a st-st-stutter."

"You are not a loser." Arthur said reflexively, pulling Merlin to sit with him. He moved his friend close enough that he could wrap his arm around him. They were close, like they had been in the past, but Arthur's heart had a mind of its own and made a fuss in his chest. "You are perfect just the way you are."

"You s-sound like m-my m-mum." Merlin said as he rest his head on Arthur’s shoulder. This sent a shiver through Arthur that ran all the way to his toes.

Instead of thinking about what that could mean, Arthur just leaned into the touch and let his head fall to Merlin’s. "Hunith is a wise woman. And she is right; you don't need to change a single thing about yourself. If anyone makes you feel like you have a problem, then they are the one that needs to change. Not you. If someone can't accept you the way you are, they don't deserve to be your friend." Arthur shifted to meet Merlin's eyes. "You are unique, Merlin, and special... you..." Arthur didn’t want to go on, afraid of what he might say next.

Merlin just scowled, biting his lip. "Y-you are the, the one who w-wanted m-me to, to t-talk m-more, Arthur. I r-really think s-speech t-therapy w-will help."

"I wanted you to talk more. Not different." Admittedly, Arthur came to the realization that he had gotten a bit possessive of Merlin, but that was just because he wanted his friend all to himself. He knew Merlin had to go off on his own, he wasn't going to keep him from that. But part of him selfishly enjoyed being Merlin's only friend. "I'm sorry I've been pushing you lately. First I wanted you to have more friends then I got jealous..."

"J-jealous?"

Arthur nervously chuckled. "Yeah. I wanted you to myself. But I never wanted you to think you needed to get out of your comfort zone. I'm sorry if I pushed you too far."

"You d-didn’t."

"You really don’t need speech therapy," Arthur insisted, bringing the conversation back to focus.

Ashamed, Merlin pulled away, crossing his arms. "B-but I w-want to, to b-be n-normal."

"You are normal, Merlin. Changing something that comes naturally is the abnormal thing." Arthur laughed, attempting to lighten the mood, but Merlin remained serious, letting his head fall. "Hey, Merlin. Listen to me. Will was an idiot. Nothing any of them say matters. Fuck the world. You can give speeches if you want. You can do voice acting. You can sing. You can do stand up comedy. You can do whatever the fuck you want! If it isn't what they consider normal then fuck all of them. Because you shouldn’t have to apologize for who you are."

Merlin was trembling. When he brought his head up again, Arthur could see he was crying. Tears pickled in Arthur’s eyes at the sight. "H-he s-said no one w-would l-ove a st-stuttering idiot."

"Well he was wrong." Arthur responded bitterly, moving in closer. Merlin didn’t retreat, just stared back at Arthur with a bit of confusion. "Because I love you, Merlin. All of you." He glanced down at Merlin’s shaking lips then met those blue eyes and made a decision. He moved in slowly, giving Merlin time to pull away, but Merlin met him in the middle, pressing their lips together as if they were always meant to be there.

"I l-love you, t-too, Arthur." Merlin stuttered, but his voice had never sounded so sure.

**Author's Note:**

> Best friends. In high school. Tamara definitely has a genre. In my defense, they are sort of perfect, aren’t they?


End file.
